This post was written by me through an activation with HireInfluence on behalf of YourCareEverywhere.com. Although I received compensation for participating in the campaign, all thoughts and opinions are my own.
We tried for almost 8 years to have our second child. I knew from the minute I became a mother, I wanted to have more than one child. I had wanted them to be close in age, but it doesn’t always happen how you plan, now does it? After 8 years, we finally found out we were pregnant. I was so excited. I was also completely not prepared for what was to come.
You know, becoming a mother can be a very tricky thing. Not only is it a big change that can sometimes feel scary, but the expectations others put on you can be the scariest part of it all.
There is no doubt that having children has been amongst the happiest moments in my life. Every day I am incredibly thankful for the opportunity that I have to be a mother. But I do think there is unspoken strain of dealing with postpartum depression.
Many mothers suffer from postpartum depression but unfortunately it is greatly under reported. Much of that has to do with the stigma that postpartum brings. After all we are always expected to be cheerful and excited after welcoming a child into the world. People can start to look at us like we don’t appreciate the gifts we have been given.
That just couldn’t be any further from the truth. After having a baby your body has undergone and is still dealing with a great change. Your hormones fluctuate and can go out of whack entirely. One thing I wish that my doctors had told me is that this is normal. It takes some time for your body to heal. It’s a very big change. For some others depression and anxiety is just par for course and I think it is important to share that you aren’t alone.
With my first daughter I experienced a little bit of anxiety but I had no idea why. At the time I just assumed that it was normal for having a child. After all having a child at all is a huge change. When my second child was born I had a very rough delivery and the experience was hard on all of us.
Afterwards I could tell that something wasn’t right. I went to my doctor who still had not told me anything about postpartum depression. I felt like the problem was with me. It wasn’t until doing a little research that I found out that it’s quite normal for a woman’s hormones to be a little crazy after childbirth and that it does get better. At first I felt very guarded about my feelings and didn’t want to let anyone down. After all, we have been trying for another child for years and I felt horrible with myself that everything wasn’t as perfect as I had hoped it would be.
Postpartum depression isn’t anything that someone should be ashamed of. In fact I think if more women talked about it that would be less of a stigma and more of us would understand what’s going on and how to help the situation. What us women need isn’t more judgment, but more support.
Here’s what I wish she would have told me after having my second child:
- Your period may not be regular for the first year after giving birth.
- You had issues with breastfeeding, you weren’t exclusive and it was really an off and on thing. It will mess with your weight and your hormones, not to mention, make your period irregular as well.
- Your hormones are balancing out and until your period becomes regular, you really will feel like a mess but it’ll get better, hang in there, you’re almost there.
- Take it easy, stop stressing out. Stress is a big cause of irregular cycles. Take a deep breath and relax.
- It’s okay to feel the way you do. Your body is adjusting. You just went through a lot.
Please don’t feel alone, depression even during pregnancy is underreported. Women often chalk it up as “hormones” hoping it will get better. It’s really important to talk to someone about what you are going through or find others who are going through something similar so you can rely on each other. I found this article helpful for anyone dealing with this during pregnancy.
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If you are experiencing postpartum depression, I highly recommend checking out this section of YourCareEverywhere.com. There is so much information provided and there for us to use.
Modern Day Moms is an award-winning publication centered around motherhood that is real and unfiltered. Basically, we don’t sugarcoat anything and aren’t afraid to tell you the truth. Let’s be best friends, we will make you feel more normal.